Mandy
Always true
- Joined
- Nov 11, 2025
- Posts
- 1,263
- Reputation
- 3,365
I can’t sleep,and if I somehow manage to sleep anyways I would just get 5 hours of sleep due to the fact I have to wake up early. And tomorrow isn’t even good for me,I hate PE,I have stress induced hyperhidrosis meaning that even if I for example focus on anything that requires physical or cognitive strain will cause me to uncontrollably sweat to the point where I tried different anti perspirants and none worked. I’m larping Crohn’s diseases to my teachers,meaning they don’t think twice if I miss a week of school or something but I simply can’t skip all the time. I may have a exam tomorrow in a topic I don’t even know the foundations of,that adds to it,either I risk writing a exam blind and embarrassing myself in PE or not go to school and get insulted by mother the entire day for it. Nobody gives a fuck about this in general and also the fact that my autism amplifies everything which is not just “Hehe nigga im so autistic”,no,literal autism.
Hitting myself is not something I necessarily like or do all the time,but in moments such as these I see literally no other solution,I also feel guilty for no reason,not guilty for hitting myself,guilty in general. I have a father with a mentally incapacitated mental disorder who in the day walks into my room at least once every 10 minutes for no reason,and it’s not even to check on me or something because all he does is to see if my charger is plugged in the socket which for some reason he hates when it is,or to simply do random shit and insult me for no reason.
I don’t know how I’ll manage the next few hours in the current moment,there’s so many possibilities.
Hitting myself is not something I necessarily like or do all the time,but in moments such as these I see literally no other solution,I also feel guilty for no reason,not guilty for hitting myself,guilty in general. I have a father with a mentally incapacitated mental disorder who in the day walks into my room at least once every 10 minutes for no reason,and it’s not even to check on me or something because all he does is to see if my charger is plugged in the socket which for some reason he hates when it is,or to simply do random shit and insult me for no reason.
I don’t know how I’ll manage the next few hours in the current moment,there’s so many possibilities.




