[Tyler_gif]

I'm not sure if anybody relates, but I wanted to make this post since I have nothing else to do.

I hate having to be fixated on only one superficial thing, which is my appearance. This is the longest fixation I've had since I was late 14, I think it's contributed to my ASD, and the neglect I've faced in my adolescence (Not asking for pity). It's my daily coping mechanism to believe that once I reach the specific status I want, I'll finally be able to gain that attention, care and peace I've always been searching for.

But at the back of my mind, I know this isn't true, and even if I do, I will eventually encounter other insecurities which I will fixate on; I constantly live in a hypothetical future, not the present.

I know that I am fully dedicated to improving my appearance: planning, researching, and strategising what would benefit me. Any time I receive a sum of money, it's always put towards my looks. When it comes to anything else, I'm not motivated whatsoever; I don't care, whilst at the same time I do. I just wish this fixation would be applied to other things.

I have an upcoming Engineering exam. I had two weeks to revise everything I've covered, but I decided to blame it on lame excuses: "Oh, it isn't the right time because I need to fix my sleeping schedule!" It's just that I am so distracted by one singular thing that I can't control.

Worst of all is that I'm hyper aware of everything I'm doing, but I choose not to do anything or change. I often wonder if I'm going to always stay like this.

 

[PsychoAssassin1]

The comments will fry you, try finding therapy if you can.

 

[Tyler_gif]

The comments will fry you, try finding therapy if you can.

Therapy won't fix my disfigured face. Nor will they give me anything insightful that I don't already know.

I'm supposed to be receiving help from something called "PsychoTherapy", but I've been waiting for years, and I doubt that I'm going to receive it any time soon. It's supposed to "help" me realise the trauma I've experienced and how it's impacted me.

I don't care if the comments will "fry" me because I doubt they're doing any better.

 

[cp_]

this is a autist trait
traits like hyper awareness,pattern recognition and technical precession were likely invaluable for tasks requiring
craftmanship and environmental understanding

 

[Circadex]

I don't care if the comments will "fry" me because I doubt they're doing any better.

Nah the average .gg user is perfectly sane, Chad, 6'4 & has a loving family that provides when asked. We're all also upper-classed aristocratics, i don't think they're not doing any better...

 

[VelocityAnt¹]

Therapy won't fix my disfigured face. Nor will they give me anything insightful that I don't already know.

I'm supposed to be receiving help from something called "PsychoTherapy", but I've been waiting for years, and I doubt that I'm going to receive it any time soon. It's supposed to "help" me realise the trauma I've experienced and how it's impacted me.

I don't care if the comments will "fry" me because I doubt they're doing any better.

Therapy pretty mid, I just go there to vent and try to have some new insights, which is often not the case. At least there is ppl who cares more about my well being than my family.

 

[hide]

Bruh your chad stop stressin